Blessed are the Peacemakers....

Howdy.

This picture made me smile today for a couple of reasons. The first, is, (obviously) the fact that these are, in my opinion, the two cutest kids in the universe. The second is that these are our kids. For reasons God only knows, Steven and I have been entrusted with the enormous privilege and responsibility of raising these two human beings.

We have had a difficult past couple of days here in happilymarriedland. We've been married for 8 1/2 years, and I have to say that it's been pretty good. But everyone has "stuff" hidden away in their hearts. It's inevitable that that stuff is going to leak out all over you at some point, and it's going to get messy. That's what happened this weekend. We were brutally honest with each other, and it got messy. You thought the Purdue-OSU upset was big news in our house? Let me tell you, those beefy 20-year-old guys had nuthin' on some of our plays here. Except we weren't playing a game -- we were in battle, each trying to defend our own egos while crushing the other's and mopping up the field with it.

But then a funny thing happened. In the midst of our finger-pointing, we each realized that there was more going on than our own hurt feelings and anger. These two little people kept right on living their lives -- building with Legos, asking for snacks, needing help using the potty and tying shoes, and begging us to watch their latest Stupid Human Tricks. We had to hit the "pause" button on our fight in order to put on the "parent" hat. And you know what? It's a good thing. When we stepped back from ourselves in order to make a snack and watch their acrobatics (which were, by the way, quite impressive), we gained perspective. Our anger lost some momentum, and we bought some valuable time to re-assess what we were saying, hearing, and feeling. By bedtime last night, apologies were said, forgiveness was granted, and some semblance of normalcy had returned. This is not to say that everything is perfect, but everything has been laid bare, ready to be mended with love and grace. Love is present, and it is deep.

I am learning more about grace every day -- what it means to receive it, and what it means to extend it. I am thankful for my little teachers, whom even unaware, continue to point me to the waiting Arms of Love.

What to expect here.....

I am a very transparent person. I'm not good at hiding my emotions and I am a terrible liar. My life is pretty much an open book. Having said that, some posts here will be lovely and neat. Others will be raw and messy. Even so, know that there are still some things in my life that will never make it to this screen -- that will stay in my head, or heart, or wherever it is that they are the safest. That's just me.

Welcome! An introduction (or "Seriously? I'm really posting a blog entry?!")

Welcome! I'm so glad you stopped by. As this is my first "official" post I thought I would attempt to answer the question I'm sure you're dying to know: Who is Sarah? Great question. I'll let you know just as soon as I figure it out.

Perhaps it would be a little easier to introduce myself by first explaining who I am NOT.

First off, I am not a creative person. Truly. I DO NOT SEW. I am terrified of a sewing machine. If you're looking for amazing arts and crafts projects to do with you children or ideas about how to decorate your home using only vintage or recycled objects, I am not your girl. Not that I wouldn't mind learning how to do these things myself. It's just that, well...those things are not my strengths. Even as a former elementary school teacher and now a homeschooling mom of two, I am constantly borrowing ideas from others. I take what works, throw out what doesn't, and try to figure out our own groove. Occasionally I do have a few original ideas that seem to work for us, but as a whole, I am not terribly artistic when it comes to creating things. And I am totally okay with that. :)

I am not an extrovert. Not that I won't start up a conversation with a stranger, but I get my batteries recharged when I spend time alone or with a few close friends rather than hours on end with a large group of people. It took me awhile to realize that this is not, in fact, a weakness. I find it amusing that our society tends to validate the extrovert personality more than an introvert, yet our culture seems to make it increasingly easier for people to isolate themselves through long hours at work, long commutes, the veil of the internet, and busyness in general. So many people have so little time for social interaction, yet it's something that all of us--introverts included, need on many different levels. Just a thought.

I am also not great at letting go of perfection. This is a humbling thing to admit, because I find that often if I can't do something well (i.e. perfectly) then I would rather just not even attempt it. Wow. Super-prideful, I know. Unfortunately this trait sneaks in to many areas of my life, presenting a myriad of challenges--er---opportunities--to grow. Joy.

What? You're still there? God bless your little heart. Okay, this was not meant to be a rant of self-flagellation. Here is who I AM:

• I am a follower of Jesus.
• I am a proud wife to Steve and have been married for 8 1/2 years.
• I am a happy mom to Ben (5) and Eliza (3). I am also blessed to be a mommy to two babies in heaven whom I cannot wait to meet one day.
• I am a musician who is constantly growing and looking for new material or making my own. I have played the harp since I was 10 and the piano since I was 8. I have an awesome purple guitar that I know 3 chords on--hoping to fix that soon. :)
• I am a born and raised Hoosier who has been transplanted to New England. All in all, it's been a great change.
• I love football.
• But I do NOT love the Patriots. GO COLTS!!
• I am learning that opportunities for grace to shine through my weaknesses abound every day.

That's it for now. I am slowly exploring the blogging world and working on this blog as I can. Must head off to bed now as this 30-something needs her beauty sleep....